like a virus.

Cancer.

What is the first thing that pops into your head when that word is brought up? For some it's the zodiac sign and for others it's worse. Much, much worse. My thoughts on cancer used to be "eh if it happens to me it happens to me. There's nothing I can do about it" but recently my outlook on cancer has changed. Not only has it changed to me, but to my family as well.

A few weeks ago my mom got diagnosed with cervical cancer. When she called me with the confirmation I broke down in the middle of the childerns museum I was at. I didn't know what to think or how to react so I cried. hearing my mom say "The doctor said its cancer" broke me inside. What have I been doing all these years? I was HORRIBLE to my mom. All I could think about in that moment was everything I had done wrong to her and everytime I had made her cry from being so mean. I finally realized what I was doing to her. 

Nowadays I feel like everyone knows someone who has/had cancer or actually has cancer. It's spreading. Like a virus everywhere. Not just one type, but hundreds. Why hasn't this been stopped? Why hasn't a cure been found? All the millions of dollars donated each year. How is this not preventable?

My mom is a lucky one. It's been caught in the early stages we've been told. It hasn't been confirmed yet, but that's so far what we have been told. I pray every night and thank God for letting me be here for her and I ask for his forgiveness for all the wrong I have done to her. I love my mom so much, and I'm done taking advantage of her.